The First Night

Major event-less, the first night was mild.
Easing us into the festivities.
Fueled by cider I announced my readiness to face the dragon.
But unprepared despite the long dressing and
make-upping sessions the rest were occupied with,
I was make up-less, and so resolved to continue application once the destination was reached

We scurried on, wanting to get to the pub before closing.
The two lagging behind
RIGHT, well go back for them or well never get there!
Turn and approach the crowd.

There they are, amongst the throngs of women, smiling.
Reveling in dresses.
Standing out in street lights.
And there she was, fangs glimmering,
Not at all changed.

Turned on my heels and felt myself move
very quickly out of there.
Perhaps o wasmt so ready.
No-not at all.

Fight or flight...
I chose flight, and flew the coop.
Before I knew it I was halfway up the town
when the little one met me.
Bright eyes she turned me on my heels
again.
"Come on, I'll go with you, it'll be ok."

Oh drama, drama, girl fucking drama.
If only i could control, alt, delete that part of my history.
Would you like to send an error report?
No, not really.
You cant fix this particular virus.
And ive crashed
Shut down.

I avoid eye contact and rush to the toilet,
Hopeing we will all be ready when i come out.
But no such luck.
Standing in clusters, my girls are tied
up with the smallest of talk with people
I dont know from Eve.

And there she is
Hide in Fie's shadow
Together we will fight her off.

She looks over but makes no attempt at
Communication or Parlay or Treaty
Good
Lets keep it at that.

While there is no tension, the situation is not tense-less.
I am on edge, eventhough there is no immediate threat to my safety,
I know i will be second looking everyone.

Here I am, essentially alone.
And like a cat, cornered i will strike.
Im sure she knows that.

We leave in a group, finally, and
rejoin the others.

Fileing into a pub Ive never been to or even seen before, its
dark and crowded and warm.
It all becomes too much
Clostrophobia and agrophobia combine to force me outside.

Closing time and the pub locks up and us out
No food in this town, its all closed.
On a friday night?
STRANGE

People talk. Random people join the group
People wander home.
I spot her talking to my little sis.
Looking over I ready myself beside Fie who
is too busy with conversation fo shield me.
Act inconspicious
In red shiny shoes, and Mary Poppins outfit...
How!?
But Laura diffuses the situation and
sends her on her way
I am relieved and relax for the first time all night.

Thank god for Lala, you lived up to your promise.

Back home I attempt to explain my
reasons for not wanting to talk with the dragon, and
after several interruptions and numerous changes of subject
I succeed to relay the events of those last few months
3 years ago.

We retire to bed and the little one said roll over
And still in the same position I fell asleep in,
I wake.